When you learn to just be...you set yourself free

When I work with clients I often encourage people by sharing how important it is to have a bit of what I call ‘Me Time’ which some people find so hard to accept. They feel guilty spending a bit of quality time on themselves but I had a lovely confirmation of how beautiful this can be when a friend and client said recently that she gave herself permission to do this and it has been life changing.

What I found interesting is she ‘gave herself permission’ which is a very powerful intent.  In those quiet moments when you can relax and listen to your inner-self you can learn over time so much about yourself and who you really are.

I have also had some amazing feedback on an article I wrote some months back for an internet online magazine called sofeminine which was called ‘Unlock Your Soul’ so I am going to include parts of it here which will help you realise how just taking a bit of quality time for yourself can help you understand yourself better.

Here’s some exciting news from the article - Life filled with more love, laughter, success and fun can sometimes seem like a dream but we can all attain this if we understand that acceptance of who we are is crucial.  

 We are all beautiful people and you are so much more than you think you are. We are all spiritual beings having a human experience and life should, and can be, filled with love and joy.

Sometimes it takes a sudden jolt to understand this - to look at your life and feel truly alive. Have you suddenly reached a turning point...and 'woken up' to life?   Have you had a 'lightbulb AHA' moment and realised there is more to life?  Do you now long for greater happiness, fulfilling relationships and success? To feel vibrant, alive and achieve more of your full potential because you can when you understand how powerful you are.  

We all have fears, doubts and challenges at sometime in our life. But when you learn to stretch yourself so you can begin to take baby steps outside your comfort zone and get passion, fun and joy back in your life, you begin to feel more vibrant as you embrace your magnificence. No one else can do this for you. When you feel good about yourself from the inside out, you become free from your limitations.

Many people are walking around half asleep and just drifting through life and don't challenge themselves any more.  When you truly 'wake up' to who you are, life changes. You begin to feel the beautiful experience of serenity. Your life will never be the same again.  Everyone has a unique spiritual journey and life blueprint and one of our lessons is to evolve into who we truly are. Everyone is different so what is right for one person may not be right for you.  Learn to live your own life as you go with the flow rather than swimming against the tide.  That’s when life becomes less of a struggle. 

Here are some steps for you to think about.

• You are perfect just as you are right now. Everything that has happened in your life has made you the person you are.  Learn from these experiences by letting go of the hurt some may have caused you. Forgiveness is a powerful step… and you may need to forgive yourself too.
• Every thought you have creates the life and experiences around you.  Change your thoughts into a more positive frame and you change your life.  This is powerful but your thoughts create your reality so listen to your ‘self-talk’.
• Visualisation is one of the most useful tools to create a better life.  What you visualise you materialise so start making mental images of what you would like your life to be like in a few years time. Imagination creates dreams becoming reality.  Stretch your imagination and watch the Universe respond as synchronicity will start to happen
• We are all made up of energy and like attracts like. Look at the people around you – are they draining your energy or inspiring you? Sometimes we have to let others go who stop us moving on.  They may not be ready so could hold you back. Once you let them go other like minded people will suddenly appear in your life.
• Ignite the passion that may have lain dormant for some time. A passion and purpose makes life meaningful so you wake up in the morning raring to go. Don’t be fearful – feel excited.
• Start taking small steps outside your comfort zone.  Small steps are believable and therefore achievable.  The more action you take, the more results you get. We all deserve a wonderful life and there is more than enough energy to go around so please don’t think this is selfish.  It’s not.
• Make time for you every day. Learn to relax and listen to the inner thoughts and ideas that may pop into your head.  These are your inner guidance and wisdom from your soul. When you learn to trust in yourself and start living as the authentic you – life will begin to flow. You will also find you have far more energy!
• Give to others your love, time, kindness & support and say ‘Thank You’ for all the abundance you already have in your life right now. Your appreciation will flow back to you in ways you may never have imagined.
• Learn to praise yourself and others.  We all achieve so much more than we realise but sometimes we concentrate on the negatives instead of the positives.  Make a list of your qualities and you may surprise yourself.  Ask others and you may be blown away!

When your soul is unlocked:

• Your soul is your magnificence and the essence of who you are deep within your core being and has been with you during many lifetimes.
• Your soul is part of your higher-self which knows what your life here in this school on earth should be. Listen to its wisdom.  We all come here for a reason which is to experience life and grow through learning and feeling. We learn from each other too. Acceptance of yourself and others is a release. Nothing or no one is perfect.  What is perfect anyway!
• Your soul is never judgemental. It is we or others who judge us. Don’t live through your ego.
• Your soul is love. Start doing what you love in life
• Let the beauty of your soul shine and your beauty will glow as others begin to see your light.  This is truly a beautiful feeling.
• When you learn to just be…you set yourself free.  Enjoy your journey as the unique and special person you are. Life is meant to be fun – so go and have some fun as you remind yourself of your magnificence – don’t hide it any more. Enjoy being ‘you’

Destiny Wisdom - everyone is going through something

Life is a series of experiences from which we learn but it can be a lonely place sometimes. But knowing you are not alone was my saving grace many years ago and I would love everyone to feel this connection as it's like having a great big beautiful hug.

It is a connection to a powerful energy which is difficult to explain but a connection to your higher self is part of your inner wisdom, which include your thoughts, your feelings and your emotions. Each experience you are going through is part of your life's plan as we need the good and the difficult to understand the difference. Plus to appreciate the joys of friendship and love to share some of those moments.

Imagine walking around with a placard saying 'do you know what has just happened to me' as I feel sad or happy today because everyone else is so wrapped up in their own life's experiences that sometimes it is hard to share how you feel.

If you are buzzing with excitement it is so much easier to share and shout about but if something hurts inside or something you have struggled with all your life is stopping you moving on, then I maybe able to help or friends will have a listening ear if you dare to ask.

How many of you reading this will say "Oh I can't bother them because they are so busy" but if they knew your feelings, then I am sure they would take the time to listen. Just sharing your feelings sometimes can create an enormous shift as if the load has lifted from your shoulders even if they can't help alter your situation. But so often we don't like to ask for help. I was one of those people for many years but then I realised that I would always help others if I can but receiving love is not always easy. Sometimes it is easier to give than receive but it is important to have a balance of both.

I remember vividly the day after my dad died I crashed my car but of course the person whom I drove into had no idea of why I had a moment of lack of concentration. They could not alter my situation and if I had told them I would have burst into tears but all I wanted to shout was 'do you know what I have just gone through' but of course they would have felt guilty that they couldn't do anything so what was the point.

So I think I am trying to say please don't ever be judgemental of others as everyone is going through something. That is part of life and we can get through what ever is thrown at us because it is just an experience we need to explore but there is always some one listening up above in a higher realm of consciousness so we really are never alone. That's not a scary thought - that's a beautiful one if you want to feel that connection and understand your life better.

I have a secret...the priceless gift of your smile

Around the world millions of people are doing it, Around the world millions wish for it. And in some parts of the world some have rarely seen it. And yet this priceless gift costs us nothing!

We go about our day sometimes with out a care in the world. On other days we carry the woes of the world on our shoulders and nothing can make you happy; yet alone smile. And yet just one smile from a friend or a stranger can lift our hearts and make us feel special.

We often don't consciously think about how we react to such a small simple gesture but it's a priceless gift which is FREE to give! Yep, that's right it costs us nothing. Sometimes £'s or $'s are exchanged in business when a fantastic deal is done and happiness and laughter makes us smile. But so often I can travel on the train or bus and see everyone with their heads down, frightened sometimes to look at people as they are so busy rushing around 24/7 and yet to receive a smile can brighten their day .

We can go to an Event and be ignored. We can live in a street and feel lonely. We can live in a town and know no-one. And yet everyone wants to be acknowledged in some way even if they don't realise it. I am so pleased I live in the country as everyone says 'hello', smiles, we may pat their dogs whilst on their walks but it makes me feel I am never alone as there is always someone willing to help if need be. I know all my neighbours and the local pubs are a hive of friendlyness and yet unfortunately they are dying out which will kill some communities. Is there anything better than sharing a conversation over a meal around your table at home, in a local restaurant or pub with your friends or family and hear laughter buzzing in your ears!

How many of you reading this know your neighbours, your postman or talk to your local shop-keeper and I bet there is a lonely person sitting on their own down your street. Especially the elderly who can fear to go out or mothers with young children who feel sometimes so isolated and would appreciate the gift of your smile as you say 'hello'

Some kids & adults today hide behind computers having 'conversations' on screen! Social Media is fantastic for many things but I truly feel it is killing the art of conversation and personal connection. You can't feel the emotion of a machine. It doesn't smile back at you or make you feel better about yourself if you are having a stressful day. It can't respond in a way to make you feel better or make you feel happier unless you come across something to move you and make you smile. And then no-one else sees that smiles other than the machine!

Some years ago I worked with some colleagues who sat in the same room and emailed each other! Our group were asked to leave this communial office and we were placed in a room out of ear shot as they found us strange! I won't comment on that but I am sure we all know office colleagues who could do with lightening up and finding something - even if it just one small thing - to smile about!

Maybe I am wrong but I smile and talk to people in restaurants, in the street, on the train and yet they are complete strangers. But do you know something....they always smile back.

So why don't we use this wonderful gesture to make the world a better and happier place. Just one extra smile a day to a complete stranger will make them and you feel a lot happier....and it will cost you nothing - just 10 seconds of your time.

Go on I dare you ....because you may never know how you can change someone' life by making them feel special as you give your priceless gift of your smile.

Connecting with yourself

One of my favourite quotes is from Dr Wayne Dwyer "You cannot be lonely if you like the person you are alone with"

Connecting with yourself to find your sense of peace, intuition, energy, connectedness & passion is the beauty of life. This is what I teach and love to share with people who have just had a lovely 'silent awakening' because they feel different and suddenly feel special.

What is happening is you are feeling the Universal Energy around you and your connection has just become stronger. We are all connected as we are all Energy. Energy is like the wind ....you can feel it but you can't see it.

This can sometimes frighten people because it is alien to them. They sometimes (not always) have never been praised so sometimes their self worth is low, and sometimes they don't really know deep down who they are. They never take the time to sit and feel the stillness around them or hear the whispers from their soul and Higher Self. It frightens them to look within and just plod on in the busy 24/7 world. Looking within can be scary because we are often frighten of what our thoughts really are deep within our sub-conscious minds.

You have just 'woken-up' which can sometimes happen after a life crisis when you take stock and have overcome the grief of a situation. That doesn't necessarily mean a death but a divorce can feel like you are grieving. I know that is what it felt like to me all those years ago.

Many of my clients say "what's happening and why me?" And I say "Why not you" - you are special and loved by all those around you but so often people don't take the time to really 'feel' it. So often we put others first but when we have self love this then overflows into all areas of your life and the people in your life 'feel' you differently as you begin to shine your light. It becomes infectious. When you are happy and a fun person to be around then others will want to be associated with your company.

Self love is never selfish. Self love is a Divine Gift. To be continued........

Your silent awakening - the gift of life

Explaining what spirituality means to others has been a long standing problem for me until I suddenly realised that it is an inner personal experience which can not be described!

It is a 'knowing' and a relationship that only I can understand and know myself but it is a beautiful inner acceptance of whom I am. I am content inside, happy and accepting and know that I am more than just me. It is something only I can feel as I connect with myself to find my sense of peace, intuition, energy, connectedness and passion for life.

I know that I am enough - just as I am right now. I have no shame or fear but just a beautiful sense of love & belonging as I feel a true sense of the beauty of myself and feel so worthy of a wonderful life.

My self courage comes from my heart and I have compassion for myself and others and acceptance of who they are too - just as I hope they feel worthy and belong to this beautiful Universe that we are all connected too.

I know that when I went into my 'dip' many years ago that the beauty of this turning point was the most amazing 'wake-up' call to life.

My wish for all of you reading this is.....you are beautiful beyond words and just ask the Universe to 'feel' this connection to all that is and your silent awakening will happen as you begin a new sense of love and belonging as we are never alone. You are so much more than you think you are right now. Be proud to be you and understanding of others as we are all unique and special

I wish you all a beautiful silent awakening within. This is the gift of life

Is the Universe a friendly place?

My answer is yes but then I realised I think I live in a sort of bubble! My world, for as long as I can remember, has always been wonderful, friendly and fascinating with all the quirks that life brings. But it always amazes me when people feel differently to me - hence I sometimes think I don't live in the real world of chaos that other people see and feel.

This question was asked at a workshop I was attending at the weekend and out of 12 delegates only 2 others agreed with me! Everyone else said their life was full of negative circumstances, negative people and even worse... they felt surrounded by hostile feelings about the world in general.

By why do we see the world so differently? I have asked myself this question over the last few days as their viewpoint shocked me. This fast 24/7 pace that we all now live in seems to have taken away so much whilst giving other benefits maybe? The wonders of technology has brought information & knowledge at our finger tips. We can communicate and travel around the world in an instant. We have more freedom and choice than ever before. Life over the last 100 years has changed beyond recognition and much of it for the better but maybe we have lost some of our values which are now missing in many peoples lives.

Families live miles apart, texting and messaging has taken over from face-2-face conversation, many people are bored especially teenagers, people live in isolation as communities break down and people just don't have time for each other as they are too busy doing their thing....but what is their thing? I hear these words 'doing my thing' from many of my clients and younger friends as they just have to be busy all the time - but why? What does that achieve? Oh yes...stress. I forgot that as I don't seem to get stressed very often which is great but again maybe I am odd as people like me aren't the norm anymore!

I could ramble on and on about this but I would love to open this question up and ask for your views. You see ...one of the big questions I feel needs to be mentioned is what about love, precious moments, special people, fun, laughter and all the opportunities out in the big wide world that with a negative mind set people miss and those that are too busy.

Please don't shatter my bubble too much as I love the space I live in but then that is my choice. I don't want to be disillusioned in many ways but then maybe I don't live in reality of what is going on around me as I choose not to feel it too. I wish more people felt like me as it makes me feel serenity for who I am and if we all saw the good in our world that surrounds us, then maybe we would slow down a little and take it all in.

Over to you.....as I leave to search for more answers

Marmite v friends. Like or dislike fun

I had to laugh recently. I was chatting to a friend about a mutual friend when suddenly she said 'oh she is like Marmite....some people like her whilst others don't!'" I have to say I agree about this person but as I like Marmite & I also liked our mutual friend it got me thinking.

We brand ourselves by the person we are and the image we portray which is really powerful. People often make an instant judgement within the first few minutes of meeting you, even if they don't know you. We all do it without even realising it. Sometimes we pick up on their energy which isn't congruent with ours and take a dislike to them even if others think they are wonderful. On the other hand we can instantly like someone even though we don't know them because they are on the same vibrational energy as we are. Like attracts like and sometimes I have met people whom I have known instantly are going to be in my life for a very long time. Whereas at other times we have to let other people go whom we don't resonate with anymore.

I used to be a Counsellor so obviously came across people who were going through a negative experience but I really don't surround myself with negative friends or anyone negative any more as they just drain your energy. Have you ever thought about the friends in your life like this?

We all move on as we grow and evolve but I find it sad that we do sometimes judge people before we get to know them. Positive & negative people can change, Sometimes it is just their situation which makes them feel negative but their energy and aura will tell you a lot about them so always follow your gut instinct and reaction when you first meet someone but please don't judge anyone. Everyone has good qualities but we may need to take our time to find them because they are not always apparent.

So for some fun - Who or what do you associate with friends? Are some Andrex puppies, Virgin Air Crew (my favourite adverts), or some one annoying like the twits on 118 118? Many people say to me that every time 'Sheila's Wheels' advert comes on the tele they think of me! (That's OK as they are fun skinny blonde ladies)

Have some fun as you go round the office or home but maybe it may be best to keep quiet - I certainly haven't told my friend she is considered like Marmite!